A Time For Everything

On May 4th, I wrote about the state of Jen. I vaguely remember the things that were weighing me down at the time, except the weather which I mentioned specifically.

I've moved on and things have gotten better mostly. The weather has warmed and turned sunny (and humid) and is better for my general outlook on life.

The one major thing that happened is still there. At the time, I was upset and angry and scared. I've had time to process the issue. I talked with a friend, did a little more research, and I was able to get a better grasp of what the issue really is. Unfortunately, there's not much I can do at the moment but work around the issue. So work around it I will.

Another issue is... I haven't written much for months. As I've said more than a few times, I should be writing...

BUT

I've also said that this is my journey. A Facebook friend (a person I have met in person) and fellow author recently wrote a post reminding all of her writer friends that our journey is indeed unique. It doesn't matter if you write fast or slow. If you publish 1 book or 5 or more in a year. We each have real lives to work around. Jobs, partners, children, pets, extended family, and on and on. And we each have to accept that about one another. Unless we walk a mile or spend a day in someone else's shoes, we cannot know what's best for that person. We cannot judge.

I have author friends who seem to be chained to their computers a lot and they seem miserable. I've never wanted to be that author. Also, unlike many, I'm not trying to make a best-seller list and I'm not trying to make a living. The only pressure I want is the pressure I put on myself for the right reasons--I'm ready and willing to get the next book written, edited, and published. The wrong reason is that much of the publishing world says I need to churn churn churn.

I'm going to turn fifty years old tomorrow. I want this time in my life to be as fun as I can make it. That means I write when I'm damn good and ready to do so. I make no excuses when people ask. I made the choice and there are consequences. Here comes the pressure though: I need and want to get back to it soon. I do enjoy it and I have a conference to get ready for.

Of course, now I have a proofreading job and a series-guide-updating job and several clients for whom I do website updates and places to go and 4th of July coming up. *sigh*

It is what it is, I guess. Better get to it.

Have a great week.

It wasn't for a person I knew well. I attended out of respect for my father-in-law as it was a member of his family. I did get to spend some time with my mother-in-law, which was nice and which I don't do often enough (so maybe an item for next year's goal list, eh?).

Anyway, the point of today's post is--I know what kind of funeral I don't want. That's not to say yesterday's service wasn't lovely, because it was. If it reflected the person it was for, then great. But a service like that wouldn't reflect me.


So I got to thinking...do I need to sorta-kinda plan my own funeral? Leave a package of notes as to what I want, even though, as my mother-in-law pointed out, funerals are for the living, for those left behind, and not for the person who died?

I'd like to think my kids would be pretty sad if/when I die--I mean, I was sad when my dad died, and I was there when choices as to caskets and music and stuff were being made, but I didn't know my dad that well anymore-- We'd lived so far apart for so many years. --and while I wasn't so overcome emotionally at that point, I didn't know what he would have liked.
My kids may or may not know me well enough upon my death. I hope they do, of course, but they may not. Or they may be so emotional that it'd be hard to think past how they're feeling right at that moment...

So maybe some general notes and a letter to each of my kids. That sounds like a good place to start.


Happy Friday!! Hope you have a great weekend.



P.S. ~ Please don't take this as me being morbid. The fact is, we're all going to die. Making the process easier on the people I leave behind isn't a bad thing.