Thursday, May 15, 2008

Thursdays post...

Oops. I almost forgot to post. The problem seems to be that I can only come up with two semi-interesting topics to blog about a week. So this week, having to write five straight, is a challenge.

So what to write, what to write... Well...

This past January, I quit working in Cubbies. Apparently, minor shock waves rippled through our church's Awana leadership. What? Jen FitzGerald quit? She must have needed a break. After all, she's served for six straight years without a break...

The fact of the matter is that I didn't need a break. I love the program itself. I love being around the kids. I enjoy the friendships I make with the other leaders. But I was fed up with a few things and didn't want to deal with it anymore. I felt like I was hitting my head against a brick wall.

Now my children, especially my younger daughter, would not dare miss a Wednesday at church. Not that I didn't try to persuade her to stay home a time or two. But her bestest friends are at church, not at school (we live in a different city, different school district from our church ), and so to church we trek each and every week.

I schlep my laptop and try to get some writing done. Not always an easy task in the backseat of my car. Really, there's no out of the way place in church to set up shop and write.

So yesterday, I happen along a casual friend of mine and stop to chat. We share a gripe session about why neither of us are in the service or serving anyplace. And we cover a wide variety of topics, including our shared disappointments in our church leadership (they're human, after all) and my Cubbies frustrations. She has a few words of advice for me, which I accept, not sure what I'm going to do with them. Not that they aren't valid and good suggestions. I just don't know if I'm ready to go there.

Service is almost over (we know this because service is projected around the church hallways and in classrooms on TV) and she asks me to go to Bible study with her, which I end up doing. So we get the final lesson of six or so on forgiveness. I did get a little something out it. There's almost always a lesson in anything.

Okay, so it's time for me to let go of my frustrations and resentments, let go of my grudge, and forgive those I have held responsible. It's also time for me to get off my high horse, and humble myself. Apologize for my behavior, attitude, whatever (Ouch. Do I really hafta?), and be a part of the solution instead.

I have some really great ideas for the Cubbies program. Hopefully, my ideas will be accepted and I will be given a chance to see if we can make them work. Hopefully, the church leadership will support me, and even help me if necessary.

As a side note and a lead in to tomorrow's post, as Bible study ended, someone asked what the next lesson was going to be. The teacher was torn between two - one of which is studying the signs of the End Times. Now that's a subject that fascinates me. I sent the teacher an email and told him how much I'd enjoy that lesson.

So then, until tomorrow ~

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