Monday, February 28, 2011

Big Fat Zero

Week number two with little or no words written. It feels good. I have a story to finish and I've been given a weeks' reprieve. Maybe I'll finish it in time, maybe I won't, though it will get finished soon.

I think I mentioned I watched all the Harry Potter movies with my family last week and the week before. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is my favorite so far. Daniel Radcliffe has a new fan, so I'll be checking out some of his other work soon. I've also started reading the books. Only 60 or so pages left of the first book, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone.

I painted this past Saturday, too. My spare/guest room. I'm taking pictures as I go. And it's all very thrilling. It's gone from a stark white room to a room that's half white and half "Cream of Mushroom". Yes, laugh, Mom. It's quite funny since I hate the soup. But the color's quite nice and matches the bed spread. My DD and I only got one coat up as a) the room took a really long time to dry b)we need to buy another gallon as the room soaked up the paint like a sponge and c) I was really sore from all that rollering over my head. Plus my legs were really achy, although whether from painting or not, I don't know. Hubby had to give me two hard-core massages and the knots are not gone yet.

The weather here is great, again. I slept with the windows open again, too.


Thursday, February 17, 2011

Back Into the Light...

It's been a really long year. Between financial hardships and drug-addicted-daughter woes, 2010 has been dubbed the year from hell. I suffered with mild depression for most of it. It (the depression and the year from hell) probably all started back in November of 2009 when my daddy died. Then it all went down hill from there.

All that to say that I am finally ready to re-enter my life. For the past year I have escaped to/hidden in the Internet and fan fiction. I've made online friends I don't want to lose, but I am definitely ready to live in the real world again.

Tonight, when I got home from work, I actually worked on the spare room--not just thought about it. It was our oldest daughter's room till she moved out and it has been sitting empty (dog beds and water bowl aside) since her departure last June. Part of it was that if she decided to come home, I didn't want her to think we had been eager to be rid of her. But I'm ready to move forward, whether she returns home or not after her stint in jail/drug rehab. So...I dug out the primer and finished painting the chair rail molding and the window trim said daughter started painting and never finished. I still have to paint the bottom portion of the wall where the baseboard molding used to cover and the small sections from behind the outlet covers she didn't take off.

And you know what? It felt good to be active and moving. I've been so sedentary, really sedentary, that I just generally felt weak and lacking energy.

On top of that, I have had an epiphany of sorts. I've come to the conclusion that I don't really want to be a writer. That I don't want to pursue publication. Oh, I enjoy writing and I enjoy learning about different aspects of writing, but getting published is hard and I really don't want to put in the effort and hard work.

I've been trying to figure out what it is I do want to do. And I've come to the conclusion that I want to be a housewife and do whatever the hell I want. If I want to read or write or bake or play a computer game all day or sit in my yard or play with my dogs, then that's what I'd like to be able to do. I really have no grand dreams of being this or that or some other thing. Someday...

Speaking of computer games, I got the second version of a game I had several years ago and have been having fun playing and not putting pressure on myself to write.

It was a good day.

Monday, February 7, 2011

I Survived the Super Bowl

No, I didn't "go to the Super Bowl". Not as a football fan at any rate. But I was there working a concession stand. I think the Packers won, but I'm really not sure and could care less.

I came away from the event with a nice long-sleeved polo shirt with Super Bowl logo (now stained with burger grease), a ball cap (given to my son), and six collectors cups (that I had to pay $7 a pop for).

The beginning of the day was crazy and poorly planned, but I will be forever grateful to whomever planned a route free of fan traffic for the buses that carted the stadium workers back to the other local venue some six miles down the highway where all stadium workers were required to park their cars. I was able to get home within an hour of leaving the stadium. And they had enough buses so there was no waiting!!