Thursday, February 19, 2009

The thing about TEXAS--

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas...
- If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas;
- If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas;
- If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas;
- If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas;
- If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas;
- If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas;
- If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas;
- If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas;
- If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas;
- If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas;
- If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas.

Need to be cheered up?
- Happy, Texas 79042
- Pep, Texas 79353
- Smiley, Texas 78159
- Paradise, Texas 76073
- Rainbow, Texas 76077
- Sweet Home, Texas 77987
- Comfort, Texas 78013
- Friendship, Texas 76530

Love the Sun?
- Sun City, Texas 78628
- Sunrise, Texas 76661
- Sunset, Texas 76270
- Sundown, Texas 79372
- Sunray, Texas 79086
- Sunny Side, Texas 77423

Want something to eat?
- Bacon, Texas 76301
- Noodle, Texas 79536
- Oatmeal, Texas 78605
- Turkey, Texas 79261
- Trout, Texas 75789
- Sugar Land, Texas 77479
- Salty, Texas 76567
- Rice, Texas 75155

And top it off with:
- Sweetwater, Texas 79556
- Orange, Texas 77632

Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!
- Detroit, Texas 75436
- Colorado City, Texas 79512
- Denver City, Texas 79323
- Klondike, Texas 75448
- Nevada, Texas 75173
- Memphis, Texas 79245
- Miami, Texas 79059
- Boston, Texas 75570
- Santa Fe, Texas 77517
- Tennessee Colony, Texas 75861
- Reno, Texas 75462

Feel like traveling outside the country? Don't bother buying a plane ticket!
- Athens, Texas 75751
- Canadian, Texas 79014
- China, Texas 77613
- Egypt, Texas 77436
- Ireland, Texas 76538
- Turkey, Texas 79261
- London, Texas 76854
- New London, Texas 75682
- Paris, Texas 75460

No need to travel to Washington D.C. - Whitehouse, Texas 75791

We even have a city named after our planet! - Earth, Texas 79031

And a city named after our State! - Texas City, Texas 77590

Exhausted? - Energy, Texas 76452

Cold? - Blanket, Texas 76432; Winters, Texas

Like to read about History?
- Santa Anna, Texas
- Goliad, Texas
- Alamo, Texas
- Gun Barrel City, Texas
- Robert Lee, Texas

Need Office Supplies? - Staples, Texas 78670

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus, Texas 76084

You guessed's on the state line...Texline, Texas 79087

For the kids...
- Kermit, Texas 79745
- Elmo, Texas 75118
- Nemo, Texas 76070
- Tarzan, Texas 79783
- Winnie, Texas 77665
- Sylvester, Texas 79560

Other city names in Texas, to make you smile...
- Frognot, Texas 75424
- Bigfoot, Texas 78005
- Hogeye, Texas 75423
- Cactus, Texas 79013
- Notrees, Texas 79759
- Best, Texas 76932
- Veribest, Texas 76886
- Kickapoo, Texas 75763
- Dime Box, Texas 77853
- Old Dime Box, Texas 77853
- Telephone, Texas 75488
- Telegraph, Texas 76883
- Whiteface, Texas 79379
- Twitty, Texas 79079

And last but not least, the Anti-Al Gore City - Kilgore, Texas 75662

And our favorites...
- Cut n Shoot, Texas
- Gun Barrell City, Texas
- Hoop And Holler, Texas
- Ding Dong, Texas and, of course,
- Muleshoe, Texas

Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas.
1. Beaumont to El Paso : 742 miles
2. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles
3. El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas.
4. World's first rodeo was in Pecos, July 4, 1883.
5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water.
6. The Heisman Trophy was named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston.
7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America.
8. Aransas Will - Ife Refuged is the winter home of North America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes.
9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.
10. The worst natural disaster in U.S . history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane, in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island.
11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20, 1969, was ' Houston.'
12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island.
13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a U.S. rainfall record of 43' in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979.
14. Texas is the only state to enter the U.S. by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union ) instead of by annexation... This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the U.S. Flag, and may divide into 5 states.
15. A Live Oak (known as Big Tree) near Fulton is estimated to be over 1000 years old.
16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.
17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper.
18. Texas has had six capital cities: Washington -on- the Brazos, Harrisburg, Galveston, Velasco, West Columbia and Austin.
19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the U.S. which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington DC (by 7 feet).
20. The name ' Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas.
21. The state mascot is the Armadillo (an interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.).
22. The first domed stadium in the U.S. was the Astrodome in Houston.

Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie, Texas:
(1) Just one God.
(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.
(3) No telling tales or gossipin'.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.
(5) Put nothin' before God.
(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.
(7) No killin'.
(8) Watch yer mouth.
(9) Don't take what ain't yers.
(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff

Now that's kinda plain and simple don'tcha think?


L.A. Mitchell said...

I love the town names to make me smile. Sounds like the perfect setting for a Rom-Com.

mtnchild said...

Are you now a Texan? Or will there always be a bit of the California Girl in you?

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